~and the blanket, well it is another~

I think of my mom so much these days even though she has been gone now for nearly 12 years.  I keep her picture along with one of my father on a shelf in our second grade classroom.  Every August as school begins, I introduce "my folks" to the kids that are under my care.  I tell my students that I keep their pictures there to remind me to always do my best and to honor the upbringing that I was given by 2 people who loved each other enough to have a little baby they named Peggy.

I keep something else in my classroom to remind me of my mother, a soft black and white checked lap robe with a white tag in the corner announcing that once it belonged to a woman named Lois Scott.

She was my mother.

I found the lap robe this past summer as I was cleaning out my sister and brother-in-law's house in Altus.  Sherry had undoubtedly taken it home after Mom had passed away in September of 2007.  She had tucked it into a box and taped it shut, never to be opened until that day last summer.  It was soft and well broken in, still in very good condition after several years of keeping Mom comfortable at the nursing home. 

I decided to take it home with me.

The lap robe ended up at school this year with the intent of putting it to use in whatever way was best for my kids.  Already this year it has lain across the little bodies of so many children in our room.  Sometimes it was when a child didn't feel well and needed to rest until they could go home.  Other times it was for those who were just plain worn out and needed the chance to lie down and sleep for an hour or two.  Sometimes it has been used for only a brief moment in time, allowing someone to just take a break and regroup.  Whatever the case might have been, my mom's black and white checked blanket came to the rescue.

It might seem silly to some for me to even say it, but when I'm grabbing that blanket and tucking it in around the shoulders of a little one, I can hear my mother's voice and feel her presence right there beside me.

"Just let them rest there awhile Peggy Ann.  They are little and need a break.  This blanket will help comfort them until they feel better. "

And my mother would have been right.
It nearly always does.

I look into the mirror and she stares back at me.  At first it always took me aback, this notion that I would look like her some day.  As I gaze at pictures of us both in our younger years, the resemblance is pretty uncanny.  Now that I have gotten older, our facial features have become even more the same.  When I see my mother in my own reflection it always stirs up a flood of emotions.  

Happiness and sadness go hand in hand.

The year is winding down with now only a few weeks remaining until the end of school in May.  Little by little I have started to box up some of my things and move them north towards our new home in Newkirk, Oklahoma.  I try to shift things around so that it doesn't look too bare but the kids have noticed.  They understand that Mike and I need to take as much up with us each time we go there in order to lighten the load on the very last day.  I assure them always that I won't go away and leave them before they have finished up their second grade year.  I promised them that, and it is a promise that I intend to keep.  There are some things that won't leave our classroom until we all say good-bye on the last day of school.

Their teacher is one of them.
And the blanket, well it is another.

I always loved this picture of my mom as she stood there in the summer of 1976.  She was 56 years old when this photo was taken and looked so happy.  I'm not sure who took the picture, but I am glad that they did.  Her heart was good and kind to everyone, especially to children.  Mom died exactly two weeks after her birthday on September 25th of 2007.  Years of struggling with congestive heart failure finally took their toll.  She was 87.